When the Church Becomes a Place of Healing

Helping women and men find healing after abortion

Every Sunday, churches across the country gather to worship, pray, and hear God’s Word.

Among those sitting in the congregation are women and men carrying stories they have never shared. Some are grieving the loss of a loved one. Some carry the pain of betrayal, addiction, or abuse.

And some quietly live with the hidden grief of a past abortion. Many have never told anyone. For them, healing after abortion can feel impossible—not because they don’t long for healing, but because they aren’t sure it is safe to begin.

Several findings from a 2015 LifeWay Research study commissioned by Care Net have stayed with me over the years. More than half of women who had experienced an abortion had never shared their story. Among women who attended church regularly, 73% were not sure God’s forgiveness applied to them, and 57% were not sure it was safe to speak with a pastor.[i]

Those findings should cause all of us to pause.

If the Church is called to proclaim grace, we must also ask whether people feel safe enough to receive it.

Silence Often Speaks Louder Than Words

As a family physician, I often found that the hardest conversations were the ones people were most afraid to begin.

I believe the Church experiences something similar.

Abortion is a difficult topic. It’s deeply personal, emotionally charged, and often surrounded by fear, shame, and regret. Understandably, many churches hesitate to speak about it, wondering if they might say the wrong thing or unintentionally cause more pain.

Yet our silence can communicate something we never intended.

When abortion is never acknowledged in the life of a church, some women conclude that their story doesn’t belong there. They begin to believe that this part of their life is simply too shameful to bring into the light. The result is often years of quiet suffering, delaying the possibility of healing after abortion that Christ longs to offer.

Truth and Grace Belong Together

The Bible speaks clearly about the value of every human life. Every person is created in the image of God, and every life has immeasurable worth. But the Bible is equally clear about God’s mercy. The gospel has never been reserved for people with uncomplicated stories.

It is for every one of us.

One woman featured in the Healing Conversations video below shares a heartbreaking journey. After experiencing rape, entering an abusive relationship, and eventually having an abortion, she described feeling devastated and hopeless. Yet the turning point wasn’t simply hearing another message about abortion. It was finding someone who created a safe place for her to tell her story for the first time.

Over the years, I’ve come to realize something important. For many women, the deepest question isn’t whether abortion ended a life. They already know. They have lived with that reality, sometimes for years. What they are wondering is something far more personal:

Is God’s grace still available for me? Can someone like me really be forgiven? Can healing still be possible?

Those are the questions the Church has the privilege of answering.

The journey toward healing after abortion begins when someone discovers that God’s grace is still available to them.

Not by minimizing the seriousness of abortion, but by proclaiming the even greater power of Christ’s mercy. The cross tells us that no sin is beyond God’s forgiveness for those who come to Him in repentance and faith. The gospel speaks honestly about sin, but it speaks even more loudly about grace.

Healing often begins when someone discovers that forgiveness is still possible.

Becoming a Church Where Healing Can Begin

One of my greatest hopes is that every church would become a place where people know they can bring their brokenness into the light. Not because we minimize sin. But because we magnify God’s grace.

One observation from the Healing Conversations video (below) has stayed with me:

The more the church is honest about sin and honest about the gospel, the more freely these things are spoken about.

That sentence reaches far beyond abortion. Whenever a church openly acknowledges both the reality of brokenness and the abundance of God’s grace, people begin to believe that healing after abortion—and healing from every kind of brokenness—is possible through Jesus Christ.

That kind of culture isn’t created by sermons alone. It’s created by people. It’s created by small group leaders who listen without condemnation. By friends who are willing to hear difficult stories. By mature believers who extend compassion before offering advice. By prayer partners who faithfully walk alongside someone over time.

Every member of the Body of Christ helps shape whether the church feels like a place of judgment or a place of restoration.

Speak as Though She Is Sitting Right There

If you’re part of a church family, assume there are women—and men—around you who have experienced abortion. Statistically, that is almost certainly true.

Whether you’re preaching a sermon, leading a Bible study, serving in children’s ministry, or simply talking with someone over coffee after the service, remember that someone nearby may be carrying a story you cannot see.

Speak about life with conviction. Speak about sin with honesty. But speak even more confidently about God’s mercy, forgiveness, and the freedom found in Jesus Christ.

People may not remember every word we say. But they will remember whether they encountered the heart of Jesus.

Walking Together Toward Healing After Abortion

Most of us won’t have all the answers when someone entrusts us with a painful story. That’s okay. We aren’t called to fix people. We’re called to walk with them.

Sometimes the greatest gift we can offer is a listening ear. Sometimes it’s helping someone take the next step toward healing by connecting them with wise counselling, a recovery ministry, or a local pregnancy care centre that offers compassionate support.

Looking Back

Looking back over my years as a family physician and later serving pregnancy care centres across Canada, I’ve become convinced that many people are not waiting for someone to win an argument.

They’re waiting for someone to notice their pain. Someone to listen without rushing. Someone to remind them that the mercy of Christ is greater than their deepest regret.

Many women who have experienced an abortion do not need someone to tell them that abortion ended a life. They already know.

What they are quietly wondering is something much more personal:

Is God’s grace still available for someone like me?

The Church has the incredible privilege of answering that question—not only through our words, but through the way we welcome people, listen to their stories, and faithfully point them to Jesus Christ.

When our churches become places where truth is spoken with love, where repentance is met with forgiveness, and where hidden shame is met with compassion, people begin to discover what the gospel has always proclaimed: no one is beyond the reach of God’s grace.

My prayer is that every church would become the kind of place where women and men carrying the burden of a past abortion know they can step into the light, experience the mercy of Christ, and discover that healing after abortion is possible because God’s grace is greater than their deepest regret.

Because the message of the gospel has never been that our sin is too great.

The message of the gospel is that God’s grace is greater.

If Someone Entrusts You With Their Story